Box dishes ready pack tomorrow or Tuesday Monday really crammed
pack day as have ZOOM Group 9-NOON Gina my PT wants finish PT session 7 on
Monday Last 8th on Wed also 1-3PM That May not happen for Wed cause I need last
Dr Appt w Dr G. either Tues Wed or Thu Dallas Physians Group only open
til NOON on Fridays
Dr G. needs to refer me for Heart Scan and possibly a stent
My Dad had at least 2 stents plus an Alblasion procedure using laser device to
shock his heart back in rhythm I do NOT have heart flutters I have had no
stroke symptoms in my left eye like Daddy had Bro will verify all this plus
Bro’s hypertension caused him have stent put in and an adjustment to his heart
med You probably know this
OK THE HARD NEWS IS THIS
I really believe I had a mild heart event and a minor stroke when
I was in Garland Behavioral Hospital They had called 911 for Young woman
patient to go to hospital cause she’d just had a miscarriage and was bleeding a
lot. Later on as time for meds & blood pressure checks I had ALL symptoms
WOMEN get from stressed induced heart ❤️ attack Think about
all stress manic psychosis I’d not had in 25 years (1990 Shoal Creek in patient
stay) and NOT had inpatient stay since 1995 & 2005 for PTSD HYPER
THYROIDITIS & MOOD INSTABILITY WHERE MY DIAGNOSIS CHANGED FOR AWHILE TO
BIPOLAR AFFECTIVE DO, RAPID CYCLING MIXED STATE CAUSE BACK 296.6 CAUSE GOING IN
OUT DEPRESSION & MANIA
DEPRESSION NOW ONLY MILD)
So to now had stress manic psychosis, PTSD cause called Bob late certain
that guy found me either through my brother at his Cheers place where he is
“Norm” actually Chili’s🌶restaurant where my Bro eats dinner every work night & even
weekends He still does Stacy told me keep spot at bar or table he likes He met
that guy there Both Vietnam vets & guy still in military or just retired to
his Dad’s place in Rhome Texas as in Rome Italy He threatened me to NEVER tell
anyone he’d been at my townhome in Arlington Tim & Liz just moved to their
Starnes home & bought it from Kim & her husband-actually assumed loan
later get their own- I opened door cause thought girl selling church candy for
church camp at mail boxes place I told them to come sell me some & my Apt #
cause cash at home but not in my wallet The Guy had stood to side of my
peephole & thouht small girls He was wearing military casual with hush
puppies shoes & aviator sun glasses He scared the hell out f me cause Daddy
had me break it off cause Guy had anger outbursts and dented his car in 1966
with his fist Daddy saw it from his workshop & came right and said “Son you
need to go on home & that’s it my daughter!” I do NOT know how he found my
parents home at 900 Dora in Bedford but he showed up while Daddy was gone cause
Mother gave him my address in Arlington and my phone. He impressed her about
his military career and acted happily married. She never bothered to call tell
me cause he had brand new black Thunderbird card and bragged about his military
career He was just back from Japan & his next assignment was in Virginia I
found ALL this out when drove over to their home much later in white shorts
& sleeveless top to show my bruises to Daddy Why would mother give my
address to him
Cause he brought her flowers and box Whitman’s chocolates like he
used to do when wanted break up with him cause he was furious IF I EVEN LOOKED
AT ANOTHER GUY! PLEASE DO NOT ALLOW MY BROTHER TO GIVE HIM MY NEW WATERFORD
ADDRESS DADDY DID NOT LIKE HIM AT ALL!!!! Daddy came back from auto parts store
& treated him like when Steve Bigham showed up unannounced & Steve had
quit HK started his own service business & stealing away some of Dad’s best
paying customers by undercutting Daddy’s prices on parts labor. Mother NEVER
told Daddy she gave him my address Daddy would tell me later how sorry he was
cause the Guy talked like he was happily married and Daddy just figured he
matured & his military service helped him
He threw Sebastian my beloved cat OUT MY FRONT DOOR!!!! He told me
story allergic to cats & ALL HE WANTED WAS HIS HIGH SCHOOL RING BACK Guys
& teen girls traded graduation rings back then When I broke it off &
asked for my ring back HE WAS NOT HAPPY A FRIEND DROVE ME TO A LAKE I THINK
CLOSE TO BOAT CLUB ROAD IN SAGINAW TX YES WE LIVED THERE I STILL DO NOT KNOW TO
THIS DAY HOW HE FOUND MY PARENTS HOME IN BEDFORD He said had access to people’s
addresses through his military job He called your Daddy a Bum & knew we
were divorced & he could have come to Las Colinas when YOU & I LIVED
ALONE MY STUPID MOTHER TOLD HIM YOU WERE HIS CHILD BUT FIRST TIME I EVER DID
THAT WAS VALENTINE’s DAY 1967 & I HAD NOTHING DO WITH HIM SINCE SPRING 1966
& NEVER ANYTHING LIKE WHAT HAPPENED ON VALENTINE’s. DAY of 1967 and you
were born October 21 1967. We married because of you! YOUR DADDY LOVES
YOU AND HE IS YOUR DADDY CAUSE YOU HAVE HIS BROWN EYES. MY MOTHER IS A
DUMBA$$!!!! THAT GUY HAD GREEN EYES & I HAVE GREEN HAZEL EYES THAT GUY
& I COULD NEVER HAVE A BROWN EYED CHILD! I CHANGED MY MAJOR FROM LIBRARY
SCIENCE TO DUEL MAJOR IN INFANCY & EARLY CHILDHOOD DEVELOPMENT AND
SOCIOLOGY! I WANTED TO BE A GREAT MOMMIE AND SO SOCIOLOGY RESEARCH LIKE WELL
KNOWN MARGARET MEED! Life turned out differently because I graduated in 1971
with BS in Education & Sociology with Honors! I went to gifted &
talented classes now AP classes in kindergarten because I could read at 4th
grade level in kindergarten and do math because my Nanny taught me School great
to me Principal walk me to my Gifted & Talented classes for 4th & 5th
graders then nap play time & lunch kids my own age 5
I won again in Roswell NM cause had a lot rocket scientists kids
& my self taking Algebra and Science plus reading at high school level When
moved Slidell LA for navy airplane project I was only in 7th grade 2 weeks
before I was put in HS in 9th grade I made my first B in English on class paper
based on Catcher in Rye cause I was too socially immature to understand the
book An older more mature girl friend helped me with social maturity parts by
explaining to me & I tutored her grammar Next paper she made B not C &
I was back to making A grades
You ARE A GENIUS IN MUSIC BECAUSE YOU MADE JAZZ BAND IN 6th grade,
That stupid 2nd grade teacher embarrassed you in front of whole class by
getting kindergarten size chair for you sit in & saying as small as you
were you s/b in kindergarten You told me NO ONE wanted be your friend! That’s
when I told you find friend in after school care! Janice found you and said she
could NOT be your friend because she came from a “broken home” I told you YES
we can be their friends because I’d have a Mommy friend who’d teach me how live
with just Mommy & Daughter We were great friends with them BUT YOU TOLD ME
YOU WANTED TO KEEP YOUR DADDY AND NOT BE FROM A BROKEN HOME. I STAYED WITH
DADDY UNTIL 1982 WHEN HENRY HELPED ME GET ARBITRATED DIVORCE I HAD TO DIVORCE
DADDY & HENRY KNEW THAT HE WON $100 GIFT CERTIFICATE FOR MAGIC TIME MACHINE
AT DADDY’s 30 TH BDAY PARTY I GAVE HIM FOR HENRY GIVING PICTURE OF DADDY AND
OUR FAMILY DOG THE TAGLINE “WHICH ONE IS THE DOG?” BECAUSE HENRY KNEW DADDY USED
CREDIT CARDS LIKE CASH WAS SPENDING YOUR COLLEGE FUND TO GET A DOCTORATE AND
CHEATING IN OTHER WAYS THAT HURT US BOTH HENRY WANTED TI TAKE US HOUSTON WHEN
HE MOVED THERE CAUSE HIS AUSTIN PSYCHOLOGY PRACTICE DID NOT MAKE PROFIT &
HE WAS USING HIS RETIREMENT NEST EGG TO FUND IT. I WORKED 3 JOBS SO DADDY COULD
GO TO GRADUATE SCHOOL FOR HIS PHD HENRY HONESTLY TOLD ME DADDY PLANNED TO LEAVE
US AFTER HE FINISHED HIS PHD THAT MEANT NO PHD FOR ME OR COLLEGE FUND FOR YOU
OR VACATIONS WHILE DADDY WAS IN SCHOOL GETTING HIS PHD THAT’s when I developed
the “Coping Strategies & Skills For Divorce” class based on us you & I
Henry paid for the brochure & I put in sweat equity to develop class &
have set made for first class-one for people going through divorce & one
for child/ren That would be our Road Map & letter you’d tell me you DID NOT
want keep Daddy & he only hurt me NOW if he hurt you! He hurt you Spring
1982 and by June 1982 Henry helped Daddy file for divorce & make him think
it was his idea. Sometimes office slow at Henry’s psychology practice &
Rose was NOT as interested in him anymore, Later Daddy would introduce Henry to
Lynn because she’d gotten TOO FAT! She was NOT fat just overweight & Henry
liked her overweight and all, Lynn loved Daddy for 8 years!
I hoped he’d marry her because she made $90,000 a year to Daddy’s
$45,000 in 1980. She gave him pricy gifts like gold watch and took him on pricy
vacations. How would I ever know this? Because Grandmama allowed them to use
her house for weekend visits & Grandmama told me so I’d get tough &
divorce her son.
He used Grandmama’s house for six years. As I wanted to divorce
Daddy since 1976 I accepted 3 “Guilt Gifts” from her a trip to Acapulco A wooly
sheep’s cream jacket from Sanger Harris & my amethyst & gold ring—ALL
FROM GRANDMAMA I LOVE HER SHE DID NOT HAVE TO BE SO GENEROUS! I wanted to
divorce Daddy since 1976- the ONLY TIME HE GAVE ME GUILT GIFT DUE TO HIS MESS
UPS “The Jazz Players” Which I Gabe first to Tim then to Christopher because my
love & respect where he was concerned WAS NOT FOR SALE BY WAY GUILT GIFT!!!
So I calmed myself from That Guy & PTSD which gives me pain
down my back A sign of Woman’s heart event I will call Dr G. office at
8:30 am for Appointment either Tues Wed or Thu at 3:30 to 4 out of
consideration for your work schedule Tomorrow is hell day-3 appointments group
Gina PT & Dr C. I am NOT AT RISK ANOTHER HEART EVENT IF I get bed by
10:30 No Art Take evening meds MEAL NOW
PLEASE RETURN GOLD RUG FOR FRONT ENTRY Gina & Christina will
NOT takes shoes off even w. Sign on door & I ask
Plus Gina uses my toilet Well it’s clean & sanitary
Please also return 2 square baking pans cause plan use last 5
apples big making apple crisp good for my PLAN DIABETES & GOUT & DO IN
BIG OVEN WHILE HAVE ONE!
3 issues with Dr G.
1 DO I TAKE JANUIVIA
2 NEED HEART SNAN FOR STENT & POSSIBLE CHANGE HEART MED
HYDROCHLORIDE
3 SCHEDULE COLONOSCOPY
MAY AS WELL CHECK ALL OFF ALL BOXES & THOSE 3 DO IT
I DO WANT TO DO DIE & GIVE THIS CREEP SATISFACTION OF SCARING
ME TO DEATH NO MORE PTSD OR PANIC ATTACKS
LAST JUST FEW PICS STONELEIGH LAPSES & NOW NEED EAT TAKE LAST
MEDS DO EMAIL TO YOU ALREADY WROTE OUT AND EMAIL TO DOROTHY ON GOALS &
SYMPTOMS I ALREADY WROTE OUT ONLY DO EMAILS GO BED!!!!!
Good night💤sleep well😴
See you tomorrow for 4 pm appointment Just text when on way
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