MY BIPOLAR MOTHER

I am the daughter of a bipolar mother. My experiences with my mother, family, and friends teach me everyone's reality is different and perception is the friend or the foe of the day. I am hoping my posts give insight to those who are curious and give comfort to those who see a parallel. I invite feedback and look forward to collaboration. It is my focus to spread joy, even on dark days. Smiles can be effortless or the workout of the day. Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, November 25, 2020

tough day at the retirement home, complaining about everything, playing the smallest violin

 

It's so difficult transitioning from being an independent person: I don't know how others are dealing with loved ones in this situation, but I know there are a lot of us in the same boat.

I just wish she would put her negativity to a more useful solution like embracing her community, making friends and just participating in the daily activities that this fantastic community has to offer.  To this day, she had NOT made one effort to attend any safe functions.  She will not interact with anyone!  This is really not too surprising as she has been doing this her whole life.  A hermit playing the smallest violin.



Today I miss ALL of my life that is gone-Hair to Wear, my own laundry just for me, my car, my relatively new sofa lamp bed chair more space that costs a lot less than worst place I have ever lived as an adult. I feel cheated out of my privacy, decent food, spaces to decorate for season ALL GONE

WHY? JUST BECAUSE I & EVERYONE ELSE MISSED HELPING BEFORE....I AM DONE!!!! I LIVE IN ONE DINKY DOO ROOM IN AN OVER BLOWN PLACE W S*** FOR FALSELY CLAIMED AMENITIES.

WASTING $2K A MONTH & 10 GRAND BLOWN ON NOTHING!

IT’S WORST KIND OF POINT THAT MY FAMILY HAS NO USE FOR ME AT ALL SO SHOVE ME OFF ON CRAP PLACE THAT COSTS $2K MONTH WHICH MEANS I HAVE ZILCH WOMEN ABUSED MORE THAN & WOMEN LIKE ME EXTRA

 

(her cleaning service knocked at her door, but she didn't pay any attention; consequently they unlocked and opened the door.) 


Briefly maybe I did not define “lack of privacy”-In NO WAY did anyone ever come in my place wherever I lived before without knocking & asking my permission. More than just handy man has master keys. Today staff did NOT KNOCK & tried to come in my room w master key. Do you know how I feel living here????????????? -LACK PRIVACY & more like a punishment & it’s humiliating! I do not care about pandemics. I care about my privacy my dignity & my safety.

I do NOT have that here!!!!!!

I WANT OUT OF HERE. I should NOT be in here with my privacy a joke, humiliated in bathroom

WHY DO YOU WANT ME IN SUCH AN AWFUL PLACE? You have locks security cameras & some assurance of privacy.

I AM DONE HERE HOWEVER WHATEVER WHENEVER.....

 

Please do not call anyone on this as it will just make it worse for me. This is just business not a home

 

Only I should have key to my place. But NOT here! They can come in anytime!!!!! No matter how embarrassing

 

 

Just an Update-I went out walking on 3rd floor. People are restless & wearing masks below nose. I am honoring distance & 2 masks tho they want to talk so I do stop to talk

& all wishing no more.

Bill put on a lot pounds. Tho he asks for 2 & 3 servings I hope 🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀I do not put on so much w just 1 serving & no desserts. The chicken breast was fried but no hint when ordered. I ate it w peas & Rosemary potatoes no bread or dessert. I love lemon 🍋 in my drink & ate it later. It was like dessert. Please take care as much as you can🥰🤗💜🌻